Does GOOG sense a downturn in ad spending? Is GOOG perhaps so nuts to pay a dividend? Is it perhaps just a cheap ploy where GOOG gives you back some of your own money that you have spent on AdWords only to “invest” it again in AdWords?
I received a letter on Jan. 30, 2010 from Google Germany (snore) with an attached coupon worth € 75.00. The letter addresses the usual stuff you can read on AdWords itself: Select your keywords, total control over budget and all that yaddayadda. I don’t know why I felt an urge in my groins to send a reply to GOOG. Was it the fifth GT, a bad prior night?? Whatever, here is my reply and my experience with AdWords:
RE: Google Adwords coupon worth €75 sent from GOOG Germany by Mrs. Sandra xxx on Jan. 18, 2010
Dear Sandra,
Thank you for sending me a coupon worth € 75.00 to be spent on AdWords. On the face of it I find it generous but then on second thoughts I found it appropriate to flash back a little. Like on an old love gone sour.
I believe I started using AdWords pretty much at the height of my mental insanity sometime in 2004 (you at GOOG have the data). Oh god, were we internet users not all gaga about all that nonsense coming out of Silly Valley (and some still are and a lot still is)? AdWords finally looked like an opportunity to get some – I must say I feel embarrassed to use this IT Senegalese – traction, visibility, exposure and what not.
So off I went, racked my brain about keywords, ad text varieties … And then it comes the time, unless you are someone that puts on the pants with a pair of pliers, where you calculate your ROI. Well, at least for me that was the point when I met reality and disillusion at the same time. To cut it short, I switched off AdWords, switched it on a couple months later, switched it off again, and so it went on. Yes, is was as boring as it sounds and it was as disappointing.
Now what I still have not forgotten were two highlights: one was an ad for a certain very special kind of adventure trip. (I won’t divulge any details since I do not want to use this communication as a pretext to advertise what we do.) This very ad cost somewhere between $120 and $160 – I forgot the exact amount – and garnered absolutely nothing, not even a single email inquiry. Yet GOOG had earned that money.
The second experience is only very recent. In the middle of 2009 we advertised over a period of roughly 2.5 months. It was again a test. We went as high as 85 cents per click (which we would never do again) just to have exposure on the first page. The result: one fake call from a competitor and one idiotic call from a cold customer, not a single email inquiry. The take of GOOG was somewhere between $ 230 and $ 250.
GOOG touts the importance of keywords. Let me see how that tallies with reality. We have a web site that is absolutely unique in its product range and the selection available. Again, no advertisement here. Let’s assume for the sake of simplicity that we offer toilet paper and nothing else besides, but in the widest color selection you could imagine. No toilet paper holder, no dispenser, nothing, just rolls of toilet paper. Now logic would suggest that when somebody types ‘toilet paper’ into the search field, the web site of this company would show up somewhere on the first three pages.
We seem to be absolutely stupid (and we are in this business since 10 years) when it comes to web design, product placement, features and, above all. the keywords we use. Because our web site shows up at exactly page 12 (twelve). In between are links to pages that either do not offer what is searched for or just one item. Our web site fits smack to what the user is looking for (buying is a totally different matter) but we are featured somewhere in the desert. So much for Google’s search relevance!
I have addressed this in an email to GOOG some years back, the response was ‘we keep it that way’. Why should GOOG change? They want you to use AdWords and even then your web site is somewhere out in the woods. Just as a passing remark, since the coupon came from Germany: we have added ad visibility in Germany on a test basis three months before Xmas. The sales result from Germany was as I predicted it, zero. The country just plain bores.
In your accompanying letter GOOG quotes the number of potential customers at 300 based on a ppc rate of 25 cents. GOOG’s math capabilities are indeed convincing (300 x € 0.25 = € 75.00), trouble is that is not how AdWords works in reality. The calculation is pure nonsense and GOOG knows that. A person who clicks on an add need not have the slightest interest in buying something. He may be bored, curious, mean-spirited etc.
Now if I were to spend the € 75.00 on AdWords, what would be different from my prior experience? Sure, I could blow the whole amount and I bet with you $ 1,000 (I am absolutely serious) that I would be surprised to have three customers coming out of this. What I do know and what people can count on when they elect to advertise on GOOG is that their spam folder will increase considerably! That is at least a guaranteed effect Google AdWords brings.
Concluding my email I am not sure what to say, and if so, politely. Let me phrase it this way:
Do I sense an iPhone/Bing effect behind this marketing plot? Is it a dividend? Is Google feeling a little on the ropes that its monopoly might be under attack? Well, as free marketer I certainly hope so, as an avid Apple junkie even more so. GOOG needs competition and it sure will come. Apple is splendidly positioned to bring this about.
I personally like to keep it in style. People who wear ape shoes without feeling stupid make me wonder if Darwin was not perhaps wrong in his theory. Anyhow, I would feel better not using the coupon, bearing a slight snicker in my mind that it is my money anyway. I appreciate the effort of GOOG but fail to see the sincerity.
Best regards,



